Wednesday, October 27, 2010

dying young

This post is dedicated to a 7 year old girl who I visited in palliative care last week.
I havent done this for some time now, and quite honestly it was about time I stepped that far outside my comfort zone to return to 4E3 (Paediatric Oncology Unit). This used to be a regular thing for me, as sometimes I was called in to pray, visit or do a little Reiki. A bittersweet experience.
As much as I dreaded it, I was equally drawn to it - in fact running toward it - feeling an intensely strong connection to those young beautiful bald heads. It was fuel for the soul and poison at the same time ... ("poison" being the sadness of the situation).

This beautiful little girl is chemo resistant, and does not have much time so the family is celebrating all of the upcoming holidays with her so she can have part of the experience before she goes home.

I observed that she seems angry and frustrated, perhaps unconsolable.
I can only imagine what is going through her mind these days - is she scared, confused, sad, lonely, feeling cheated...?
At this point in time, there is no stuffy or prize that is going to comfort this child. Lets hope its Gods grace that finds her and puts her at peace.

Just when I thought the situation could not feel more forlorn - I learned that besides this little girl (and 2 year old Taylor), there is still another 3 children who just received the same news "its over".
The only thing left for the hospital to do is to keep them comfortable.

I have several friends in my life that have lost their children due to illness. While we hold these little ones in our thoughts, lets say a prayer for the parents too.

Im a solid believer in the power of prayer and attitude. This does not mean I believe this will override fate, but perhaps sometimes it can, especially if collectively the prayer is powerful?

I believe it helped my Kali, Natasia, Alexis, Mackenzie, Eli, Robert, Rachel, Drew (to name a few fragile cases) and now hopefully little Taylor (who's recent lumbar puncture resulted as "normal").
I'll say it again....
Our children in this economy and advances aught to be worrying about their marks in schools, doing their chores and not getting grounded... not their mortality.



1 comment:

  1. Tammy, I so agree. We met a young girl who faced that same "the end" diagnosis. She was so young, so angry, so unhappy. I can't imagine how or what she must have thought. She was so incredibly cheated to have to suffer, especially so young and then cope with the knowledge of her upcoming death. It is so unfathomable to think of.

    Good for you Tammy, how brave! If anything I hope some of your energy and hope passed on to her.

    Leah, Taylor's Auntie

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