Physio

I started physio yesterday.

Normally I'm a "go to the chiropractor - slam my bones" kinda girl.

I dont like wasting time healing, just reef on me - got stuff to do.

But the doc sent me to Physio instead. I'm thinking "if they cant make me cry, is it worth my time?", but I go anyways because doc no longer negotiates with me.

Yesterday went pretty well. I wondered if my therapist was 12, so I asked her. I feel better that she's a bit older. She did help me... enough that I was able to drag myself to the Back Street Boys concert (all thanks to gramma for the handicap parking, and my friend Loc for the tix).

Supposed to be on bedrest, so therapist girl agreed that seeing the boys was cause to do something stupid (well, I knew she was thinking it so I went).

They were definitely worth it (except the 4 bimbos sitting in front of us caused such unpleasant distraction). Good news was that I found places to dispose of my gum.

Yesterday after the heat, ultra sound and current, therapist talked about stretching my spine.

Makes sense....

Gord mentioned hanging by the knees on the monkey bars so I thought I'd give it a whirl after my treatment. Why not? I felt pretty good, and the pain meds were very kind.

I picked up Kali and we went to the park with a chair. I knew she could be of assistance being my height and weight. I got sand in my hair, and the dog poo beneath made for cleaver measures getting down, but she was able to help me, not without a smirk on her face.

So today I was placed on a stretching table where I where an uncomfortable harness (like a corset) imprisoned me for 10 minutes. I thought about my first wedding...

The person is belted across the ribs and hips. Being flat chested, the harness slips right across the jubblies like butter, on the south end causes a severe case of plumbers crack.

I dont fancy this treatment, and much prefer the park with the sand and the poo.

I am determined not to waste what little summer we have, creating a sink hole in my couch.

All I think is " imagine if this occurred over Massacure season?". Cant afford THAT to happen, so Ive got to get crackin to get moving again.

Im thinking laxatives may get me limber quicker than physio, at least running shorter distances.

Will keep you posted with the progress.

Our story

Well folks,

Ive realized a few things in the days that I have been laid up and sprawled out on my couch....

First... about this attention deficit thing- it may actually hold some truth, but Im am still in active denial so don't bring it up with me if you see me on the street (wait.... I'm NOT on the street). :(

Also, I really do like Golden Girls, and I think I have hit a wall in regards to retelling our "story" over and over from Fall to February.

I know these subjects have no relevance to each other, but this is my current thought process these days (besides meeting Ellen and snagging a punchy entertainer to perform for the event).

I think it's because I am halfway through "Eat Love Pray" and it's been eye opening.

My daughter always picks the best books for me, so after reading this particular one, she was enlightened to enlighten me.

I do not share the same story as the author (for those of you who are familiar), however what I relate to is "hitting a wall".

Cancer has been in predominantly in our lives for 10 years now, and although I am thankful for our many blessings (resulting as the silver lining) I have that gut feel that in some ways it's time to move on.

Cancer has also taken our home, our lifestyle and our marriage, so moving on encompasses so much more.

My thought process is this:

What I'm prepared to do is remain with the event as the executive director, diva, or big cheese...

I'm prepared to work hard with my magnificent team (and hopefully have some fun doing it....)

I'm prepared to torture my hair every winter by bleaching, pinking and bleaching again....

I'm prepared to carry Preparation H around in my purse for television spots (dontcha love HD)...

walk around with a large pink dog, wear a black hoodie with my name on it everyday for 4 months, drive a billboard, create unorganized chaos, lint brush KaliBear hair off of everything, miss sleep, not drink coffee or ingest sugar for the entire champaign, time with family and Christmas (as it rightfully should be celebrated).

I am no longer prepared to live in the past, pull my daughter out of school every 3rd day, establish her soul identity as the "little girl who fought cancer" and retell our story - her battle.

We all agree as a family that its time to move on and put her cancer behind us.

Now, I'm not quite sure how to do this as "cancer" is the very motivation behind the event and the "story" is the fuel that makes this event popular. So this is my assigned brain storming while I lay on my couch getting fatter by the day. How to promote the event without our story (as this has become signature).

This worries me, but I am desperate for change.

Would love your feedback....

Laid Up

Ok... so here I am laying sideways in hopes of taking pressure off my left leg. Im happy I have a laptop so at least I am productive for something.

Looks like I may have a ruptured disk and the doc has placed me on bedrest. This is the forth time now in my life that I have been grounded to the couch and I hate it. :(

Kyrsti is away at her friends cabin, Mandy has the flu and so all the pressure lays on Miss Kali.

Guess thats karma for her ... :)

Kali is juggling tasks - filling in for Mandy at work (at the dog groomer), cooking and cleaning and catering to my every whim... at the age of 12. Good thing this kid is good natured and does not allow complaint to find her. She makes the BEST tea ever.

I am awaiting a CT scan and meanwhile I feel miserable.

I wish I had a really good story (like a fishing story) to share with you, but I got nothing. I do however feel it still relates to my Firebird / karma story, but geez this is taking it way too far!

Likely this relates to being hit on a motorcycle and then run over 5 years ago.

3 pregnancies, I was forced to lay like a beached whale on the couch for 2 months. This combined with NOW has not brought out my best features.... think Im growing a tail,

and horns.

Gord has been coming to the rescue as well, and my very awesome daughter (Megs) and friends have been checking up on me frequently.... little do they know that my imprisonment has caused my neck to spin around.

How many episodes of Friends and golden Girls will I be able to stomach?

In between that I am checking my emails every 5 minutes and reading Eat Love Pray, texting, facebooking, and now blogging - all on T3's. Weeeeeeee...

On that note, I will divulge something kinda interesting (to me anyways). During my daughters therapist appointment, I accidentally learned that A.D.D. may be added to my title of "Hair Diva". How does that work, and why is it that my hidden issues became more interesting than the patient? Apparently I scored 89% on an A.D.D test. Whatever.

Do I have this across my forehead? Is it because the staff at the Tim Hortons I frequent can recognize my purse? Or because I have 14 windows up on my screen on a slow day? Do I really LOVE chaos? And most people fidget and text while they pee dont they?

I asked the other voices in my head to see what they thought and they were quite surprised at this observation, however my dearest friends and kids think someone should have said it years ago. Now thats just mean. :(

So I am having another meeting with my voices and my children and we are going to come up with a plan to take back to the therapist cause thats how I roll.

Im on the couch anyways, so I will come up with a solution for my back, my A.D.D. and how to get on the Ellen show (cause I need her to teach me some dance moves).

Cheers.

Update you on the saga of the couch...

Beamers Cabin

Todays post is about our week a while back spent with the 2 therapy dogs at the Stollery and their owner Neil.

I have a previous post a while back dedicated to Beamer (who is the senior of these 2 dogs).

We'll start with Beamer.

Kali and I met Beamer 9 years ago in Oncology. It was just another day in H.E. double hockey sticks when a very nice gentleman walked through the ward with this magnificent standard white poodle.

This surprise was just what the doctor had ordered, Kali's spirits were lifted and as a result, so were mine.

I was most intrigued by this dog and his owner. They just seemed to share the exact same personality, the impact their visit made on the kids was magical.

After over an hour of "poodle talk", my perception about "these dogs" had turned a 180 (this poodle idea eventually became the precursor to a F.R.E.D. )

I also learned that Neil and Beamer visited the Stollery every Tuesday, focusing primarily on Peds Oncology.

10 years later, Beamer is now 14 and recently retired. This I consider to be a HUGE volunteer commitment when you consider that one day per week, this man missed work to drive one hour to and from with his dogs to provide an outstanding service to some seriously needy children.

The other dog is Murphy - a very large brown Irish Water Spaniel who has the most docile personality. Kids can lay on him, tug at him, pull his ears and he does the drop, roll and plea for a fat belly rub.

Anyhoo, we had the pleasure of spending 4 days with these guys at their cabin, riding boats, convertibles, fishing, sking, tubing, fetching, fireworks and playing crib. Very relaxing get away, treated like royalty, hard to leave. Kids spent a LOT of time on the water tubing, boogy boarding, skiing....I am far too woosy for water sports, however did go for a 15 minute round in the tube. This time I didnt swallow the lake, and hey - no sea weed in my ears! Neil rocks the water on skis and just about anything, which gave me opportunity to drive the boat.

I think about karma and how this family has been blessed by what they do for others. Beamer's mom - a brave survivor of breast cancer, now in remission and doing well.

It was interesting to learn of the many stories involving these 2 dogs. Since the day I have met Neil, I have been a sponge trying to absorb all of the experiences that have blessed him involving the kids. I know that he has seen more loss than we have, as he has been directly involved with the kids for 10 years. I also know this has taken a toll on this man, as he too is a father and grandfather, and the children they have seen are all to easy to connect with.

Beamer is in remarkable shape for a dog his age, still plays, reads people, and is all too available for a cuddle. He reminds me a lot of FRED in some poodly ways except Beamer isnt a jerk ever, and Fred sometimes is.

Anyhoo, we were very fortunate for the days spent with Neil and his furry boys. This journey truly has been bitter - sweet. So many perks along the way... so much sad.